ALL or NOTHING?
Elizabeth Willis Barrett……….July 6, 2022
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa—I can’t do it all! The stupid thing is that I ever thought I could! I thought I could send out a weekly newsletter, write a book, have several coaching clients, host a monthly podcast, expound in personal essays, post several times a week on Instagram, keep up with Facebook, develop some online classes, gather women for semi-annual grandmother retreats, teach group piano and ukulele classes and manage my website. All of that along with keeping up with this house that I love, cooking once in a while, organizing my unruly stuff, being with Brad, enjoying friends, kids and grandkids, practicing the guitar and learning how to take great pictures along with editing them in Lightroom and Photoshop.
Now that the realization of my craziness has finally caught up with me, I am hoisting the white flag, taking a meditative breath and re-evaluating.
Does anyone really mind if I don’t organize a Grandmother’s Retreat? Does the world really need one more podcast right now? If I ignore Instagram for awhile, will something bad happen? No, No, and No!
Brad might care if every single night he is “on his own” for dinner. And I hope the family would care if I totally ignored them. But the other stuff? I put it on myself. I carry the weight of the incompletions—no one else even notices!
Just stating this gives me some peace. I absolutely don’t want to become like Elizabeth Holmes as portrayed marvelously by Amanda Seyfried in the movie The Dropout. That Elizabeth was so terrifically driven that her life kind of imploded. There is something to be said about relaxing a bit and going with the flow. (My problem has always been that the flow doesn’t necessarily take me where I want to go.)
However, deep contemplation tells me that I don’t need to give up everything. I have a great need to feel that I am progressing and contributing outside my family. I need to know that each of my days is used well. But I don’t need to do everything at once. When night comes, if I’ve done three or four things that really matter to myself and others, then that day is a good one.
And if I sometimes find myself spending too much time solving Sudokus or watching Midsomer Murders or following celebrity leads on my phone, I will instead pick up my guitar or continue writing my book or start sending out a newsletter. So, when I finally do the latter—I hope you’ll read it!
I have always thought you are amazing.
That is very kind of you, Cate!
That is very kind of you, Cate!